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List of character quotes in Banjo is Back!
Here is a comprehensive list of all the character quotes and conversations featured in Banjo is Back! Cutscenes Introduction NOTE: Act 1 plays before the title screen. Act 2 plays after the player selects a new file. Act 1 Our heroes welcome the new day * Banjo: Yawn... Good morning, Spiral Mountain! You smell lovely! * Kazooie: Sure, if you like the scent of a bear's armpits in the morning. * Banjo: Kazooie! * Kazooie: Sorry... * (Banjo check the mailbox) * Banjo: I wonder what Mr. Postman left for us today. Probably an invitation to the next Smash Bros.! * Kazooie: Not likely. From what I heard, Mr. Sakurai is still pumping out DLC characters for Smash Ultimate as we speak. * Banjo: Ooooh... what's this? * Kazooie: Lemme guess, a jury summons? * Banjo: No, it's.... a poem. Hey, I like poetry! * Kazooie: Well, what are you waiting for? Read it! * Banjo: Ahem... "VIOLETS ARE BLUE, ROSES ARE RED, WE'RE COMING ABOARD, PREPARE TO EAT LEAD." ''Say... What do you think could that mean? * '''Kazooie:' How should I know? I'm just a second-banana sidekick who lives in a backpack. * Banjo: Whoa, there! Watch... * Kazooie: ....My mouth? Yeah, Like I haven't heard that before. * Banjo: No! I mean WATCH OUT! * Kazooie: Huh? * (Cannonbals are firing in all directions, our heroes barely succeed in avoiding them) * Banjo: Yikes! Eek! Whoooah! * Kazooie: Hey! Watch it, you oversized marble! * Banjo: That was close... You okay, Kazooie? * Kazooie: I'm cool, Banjo. We've been through much worse than this! * ????: Arr.. It be getting much MUCH worse, lass. * Kazooie: Now's not the time for pirate talk, you know. * Banjo: That wasn't me! It was... * ????: Turn 'round, ye rascally landlubbers! Captain Blackeye returns (and takes over Spiral Mountain) * Banjo: Captain Blackeye? Did we meet at Jolly Roger's that one time? * Captain Blackeye: Yar better believe it, me bucko! Aye be here to take what be rightfully mine! * Kazooie: Don`t look at me, root beer breath! I'm NO one's parrot! * Captain Blackeye: Nah! This here Spiraly Mountain be what is mine! * Banjo: You mean Spiral Mountain? I do apologize, but I believe I am the rightful owner of this establishment. Says so right here, in the deed. * Captain Blackeye: Arrr... Aye understand. You best show me this deed so I be proven wrong. * Kazooie: Banjo!! What're you thinking?! We worked hard for that! Remember all the nuts or bolts we had to put up with?!! * Banjo: It will only be for a minute, Kazooie. * Captain Blackeye: Aye be gettin' me deed readin' glasses, if ye don't mind... * Kazooie: Pssst.... Let's ditch this salty loony while we still can. * Banjo: Kazooie, quit getting your feathers tied up in a... * Captain Blackeye: GOTCHYA! The deed be mine! * Banjo: Hey, that wasn't very nice! * Kazooie: You can't mess with my friends, patchy! That's MY job! Besides, the deed has my... well, OUR names on it! * Captain Blackeye: Arr! Good point! Lucky I got me a Banjo mask from BanjoLand! * Banjo: Can he do that? Isn't that illegal? * Kazooie: Dude, we're dealing with a PIRATE! Anything is possible! * Captain Blackeye: The red rooster be right! Alrighty then, me shipmates! Thar be one more thing to do before we re-claim this here mountain! * Kazooie: Apologize for calling me "rooster"? * Captain Blackeye: Nah, THIS be it! FIRE!!! * (Blackeye presses a button and launches a huge bomb) * Kazooie: What is scurvy face talking about? There's no fire... * Banjo: KAZOOIE!!! LOOK!!! * Kazooie: WHOAH!! * Banjo: W-what's that?! * Cannonbomb: CANNONBOMB ACTIVE. SELF DESTRUCT IN T-MINUS 3.... 2.... 1.... KABOOM!!! * (The bomb explodes and Banjo and Kazooie are propelled upwards) * Captain Blackeye: Yargh!! Bullseye! So long, bear n' rooster! Spiraly Mountain be ours, now! * (The screen fades to black, Banjo and Kazooie wake up on board the Salty Hippo) * Banjo: Yawn... * Kazooie: What... just happened? * Banjo: Hey, Kazooie.... I just had the wierdest nightmare. We were attacked by this pirate who took away the deed to Spiral Mountain... * Kazooie: Ugh.. Me, too. I dreamt I was stuck in a bear's backpack for a series of 3D collect-a-thon adventure games. * ???: That be no dream, shipmates... * Banjo: Hey, it's him! Captain Blackeye! * Kazooie: No, Banjo. It's just our dear old friend, Blubber Face. * Captain Blubber: Ahoy, mateys! What a surprise, this be! You alright? * Banjo: Captain Blubber? Wait.... where were you on Captain Blackeye's ship! * Captain Blubber: Captain Blackeye?! He be back?! What in the high seas did he DO to ye? * Kazooie: Nothing much, really. Just blew us out of Spiral Mountain and took the deed away from us. * Captain Blubber: Yar! That Cap'n Blackeye still be up to no good! Ye be needin' my help to get back at 'em! Act 2 Captain Blubber's Backstory * Kazooie: So, tell us, Blubber Butt, how did you know Captain Blackeye would attack us? * Captain Blubber: Arrgh... I once be on Blackeye's crew, many years ago. First Mate Blubber, I was. * Kazooie: Okay then, "First Mate Blubber Butt", care to tell us more? * Captain Blackeye: I be glad to! Blackeye and I were once the bestest of best friends, but then one day, he be startin' to take more than just treasure. He be obsessed, that Blackeye. Obsessed with power... Wantin' to be more than just "Captain". * Banjo: Did you do anything to stop him? * Captain Blackeye: You bet, bucko! I tried talkin' sense into him, I did! Told him thar be more to a pirate's life than just takin'... an' stealin'... an' what not. Wanted him to be realizin' what he was doing was NOT the pirate way! But he refused to listen to me. He refused to be me best friend. So, I walked the plank, never to see or speak to him again. * Banjo: Well, the joke's on him! Look at you now, you're not First Mate anymore! You have your own ship and crew and everything! * Captain Blubber: Yar be right, Banjo! In fact, I'd be wanting ye to see me First Mate for a while now. Shall I bring her up? * Banjo: Yes, please! * Kazooie: Sure, why not? Anything is better than your tuna breath. * Banjo: Kazooie! * Captain Blubber: Don't ye worry, lad. Me ol' breath has always been "off course". Gruntilda, reporting for duty! * Captain Blubber: Ahem... FIRST MATE! Report to the poop deck, NOW! * ???: I'm on my way, no need to wait! Please don't use me as live bait! * Banjo: Her voice sounds oddly familiar. * Kazooie: OH NO. That rhyming... I know who it is! * Gruntilda: Yes, that's me! I am here! Captain, care for a pint of root beer? * Banjo: What is she doing here, Captain Blubber? * Kazooie: Yeah, I`ve been wanting to kick her sorry hide without using crummy vehicles for a LONG time! * Gruntilda: Hey now, there's no reason to be rude! I've changed my ways, I'm now a cooler dude! * Kazooie: I'm not convinced. Aren't you supposed to be working at that game factory? * Captain Blubber: Arrr! I be bustin' her out, I did! * Gruntilda: The captain's right! I'm a free man! C'mon, you guys, what's the plan? * Captain Blubber: First mate, I need ye to help Banjo an' Kazooie with an' important mission! * Banjo: Blackeye took away our deed to Spiral Mountain, and we got to get it back! * Kazooie: Yeah, and I bet he's making himself pretty comfortable in your old lair! * Gruntilda: I'll turn him into a lobster and then I'll boil it! That's what he gets for using Dingpot as a toilet! * Kazooie: I'm.... gonna pretend I never heard that. The Journey Begins * Captain Blubber: Yar, so it be settled! Here's what we be doin' to take care of Blackeye: Banjo, you an' Kazooie are in charge of gettin' me Jiggies. * Banjo: How many? * Gruntilda: Lots 'o Jiggies, me lad. The ol' Salty Hippo cannot get to Blackeye's without enough. * Gruntilda: What about me? What do I do? I thought I was a part of this crew! * Captain Blubber: Arr, settle down, First Mate! You be doin' your part! Banjo an' Kazooie shall get me Jiggies durin' the day, you be gettin' Jiggies at night! * Gruntilda: The night shift, you say? Then I shall prepare, to kick the night time baddies' derrière! * Captain Blubber: That be the spirit, First Mate! Come now, Banjo and Kazooie! We must set sail for our first island! * Kazooie: Whatever you say, salt lips! * Banjo: I sure hope you know what you're doing, captain... Meanwhile, under the sea... * Captain Blackeye: So... me First Mate be planning a mutiny against ol' Blackeye, eh? * ???: Aren't you worried, sir? * Captain Blackeye: Don't ye worry... We shall see about THAT! Yar har HAR! YAR HAR! * ???: Yo, ho, ho and a.... bag of plums! Return to Spiral Mountain Banjo and friends are ready to go home * Captain Blubber: Yo, ho, ho! Congrats, me hearties! You three collected all the Jiggies the ol' Salty Hippo needs to finally set sail! * Banjo: We couldn't have done it without you, captain. * Kazooie: Yes, we could have, Banjo! Remember how we did it without him in the last few games? * Banjo: I was just being nice, that's all. * Grunty: Shut your trap, fleabags! Let's head on over to the Isle o' Hags! * Captain Blubber: Yar be right, First Mate! There be no tellin' what else Blackeye plans on doin' unless we stop him! Our heroes arrive back home... or do they? Things have changed * Kazooie: "Coneybeard Island"? Hey, blubber face, I think your GPS may be busted! * Captain Blubber: I assure you, lass, we made it! * Banjo: The captain's right, Kazooie! This is indeed our beloved Spiral Mountain, but I think Blackeye gave it a makeover... * Kazooie: Ugh... What is this, another amusement park? And I thought Witchyworld was tacky. * Banjo: All the same, we need to find Blackeye and get our deed back! * Grunty: Where's the potty? I need to take a leak! My dress is being soiled as we speak! * Kazooie: Can't you just hold it, wart head? * Banjo: Apparently not, Kazooie! Let's hurry! Gunty finds a porta potty * Grunty: Sweet relief is here, at last! My bladder troubles will be a thing of the past! * Kazooie: Get going, toad lips! The sooner you go, the sooner we can finish this dumb game. * Grunty: Come now, Kazooie, I must not rush! I shall take my time and then I'll flush! * (Suddenly, the porta potty disappears) * Banjo: What the heck was that?! * Kazooie: It's a glitch, Banjo. Every game has at least one. Deal with it. * Banjo: That still doesn't explain what happened to Grunty! We gotta find her! * Kazooie: So apparently getting back our home is less important than rescuing our sworn enemy? * Banjo: I know, Kazooie. But it's fair we helped her since she spent all this time helping us. Banjo and Kazooie find Grunty and meet Chuck * Banjo: Grunty! You're alright! * Kazooie: And you used the potty like a big girl. Good job! You deserve a sticker! * Grunty: Congrats, you solved the disappearance caper! All that's left is a fresh roll of paper! * Banjo: I am still puzzled why you vanished in the first place. Where are we, anyway? * ???: Right into my trap! * Kazooie: Who said that? Your mom? * Banjo: I don't think so, Kazooie. It's probably.... * (A large figure jumps out from the shadows) * ???: ME! I am Chuck, the Evil Sandwich Making Guy! * Kazooie: So YOU'RE the jerk that made those rotten sandwiches! * Chuck: They are most certainly NOT rotten! They're my sweet babies that you smushed to bits! * Kazooie: Only because they're bosses the game requires us to fight... * Banjo: Maybe they wouldn't be bosses if Chuck used honey as a secret ingredient. * Chuck: I'll have you know honey ruins the flavor! Not that it matters, since I'm gonna make all three of you into a sandwich fit for a king! * Grunty: What are you talking about, you fat bloke? With a sandwich that big, he'll most likely choke! Gruntilda's Quotes As with any Banjo-Kazooie game, Gruntilda the witch talks exclusively using rhyming quotes. The following is a collection of all of Grunty's quotes throughout Banjo is Back!. General * The sun has gone out for a while, it's time we do things Grunty style! * Oh dear, what's this? Another boss fight? As a bad guy myself, this doesn't feel right. * When the sun appears, I'll be gone, and you'll be stuck with THEM from now on! * I'm no werewolf, but I howl at the moon. I'll get this mission done real soon! * Good thing my sisters ain't here! My obnoxious rhyming is what they fear! * So I'm finally here, performing for you, if you know the controls, you can join in too! Attacks Using Broom Sweep * My trusty broom ain't got no fleas! Move aside, Kazooie, if you'd please! * Prepare for trouble, make it double, broomstick and I will reduce you to rubble! * Although I may be colorblind, I shall be kicking your sorry behind! Using Broom Fllight * Roses are red, my plane is violet, I wish for a new Banjo-Pilot! Using Skull Bowl * Give those cronies what's what with a strike? Use my head to bowl, I do not like! * I got a bowling pin stuck in my eye! This is humiliating, I cannot deny! Using Skull in One * I'm not that sporty, I must say, but if I see something important, I'll fire away! Locations Neander Island Anything n' Everything = Talking to Stroganoff - Part 1 = * Stroganoff: Hej, ful häxa! Välkommen! Hur kan jag hjälpa dig? (Hello, ugly witch! Welcome! How may I help you?) * Grunty: A second language is a requirement, your bilingual skills must come out of retirement! * Stroganoff: Va? Vad menar du? (Huh? What do you mean?) = Taking to Stroganoff - Part 2 = * Stroganoff: Välkommen tillbaka! (Welcome back!) * Grunty: I still cannot understand what you say! An English translator I shall get today! = Talking to Stroganoff - Part 3 (after Grunty finds English translator): = * Grunty: This new book you shall study, then you and I shall be buddies! * Stroganoff: Hello.... welcome... to.... Anything.... and.... Everything.... My.... name.... is.... Stroganoff.... How.... may... I.... help.... you....? * Grunty: I'll bonk you in the head with a shovel and pail, to make you talk faster than a snail! * Stroganoff: Sorry.... I never... learned English.... before. Anyways... what... would you... like to get? = Talking to Stroganoff - Part 4 (Grunty does not have enough notes to purchase this item) = * Stroganoff: I am... sorry... but... you will... need to... get more... notes... * Grunty: You won't let me have it for free, so I must go on a note collecting spree! = Talking to Stroganoff - Part 5 (Grunty has enough notes to purchase this item) = * Stroganoff: Thank you... for the notes... Here is.... your.... item. * Grunty: A pleasure doing business with you, I can now share this with my crew! Klondike Island In the mines * It's so dang dark, I neec some light, then I can start this fetch quest right. * Glitter Gulch's got nothing on this! The treasure's so bright, it's hard to miss! Anything and Everything = Talking to Stroganoff - Part 1 = * Stroganoff: Howdy, partner! Welcome to Anythin' and Everythin'! What do y'all want me to saddle up for you today, partner? * Grunty: I see that you studied that book rather well, and all without a single magic spell! * Stroganoff: Well, missy, y'all helped me to speak like a normal person! I can't thank ya enough! In fact, anytime ya need to rustle up supplies, y'all can just take it! I don't mind! * Grunty: No more hunting notes for me? I can just have it for free? * Stroganoff: Sure thing, partner! Anything for you! Don't ya go tellin' Chip, though. He'll go nuts if he ever found out! * Grunty: My lips are sealed, don't you fret! And if he does find out, I'll make him forget! Machine Island Game Factory * I sure hope L.O.G. doesn't know I've escaped... He'll bolt me down with iron tape! * This box is full of hedgehog crud! Didn't they know that game would be a dud? Talking to Penny - Part 1 * Penny: Hello, ma'am. My name is Penny Crygor, but everyone calls me Penny. Care to help me with my invention? * Grunty: If there is a shiny prize involved, I shall help your mystery be solved! * Penny: I'm not a detective, ma'am. * Grunty: Sorry about that, I just met you. My name's Grunty. What's there to do? * Penny: I need you to help me get the right parts for my invention: the S.S.S. Maker 3000. The list shows what you need and where to find it. * Grunty: I'm pretty used to fetch quests, these days. I'll find my way through this maze. * Penny: Wonderful! Glad you can help. Talking to Penny - Part 2 * Penny: I appreciate you getting me parts for my S.S.S. Maker 3000. * Grunty: Helping you build a machine ain't fun. I learned that when I made the Hag 1. * Penny: Y'know, Grunty, S.S.S. stands for "Super Size Serum." * Grunty An elixir that makes you grow? You're joking, right? Say it ain't so! * Penny: If I was, I'd be on stage wearing a goofy bow tie. Does it look like I'm wearing a bow tie, right now? * Grunty: I would be lying if I said yes, but that could be anybody's first guess. * Penny: Welll, there is still one more part left. Volcasnow Island General * This snow is made of toothpaste? Dentists say it's a big waste! * I wonder how Mildred felt, soon after her husband melt... Inside Dedede's Video Game Collection * Hey, you! Big fat bird! Being in a box of games is absurd! * Tooie feels more like a Banjo-Threeie than that vehicle-building trash for the 360! * My Revenge is the series' second endeavor! You say it's the third game? Well, I never! Rainforecity Island In the city * Chimps? Gorillas? Orangutans?! No way I'M washing those dirty hands! * These guys have thumbs on their feet? I must admit, that's pretty neat. * I'm no monkey's uncle, you dumbos! You fleabags are worse than a million Klungos! Talking to Chimpy - Part 1 * Chimpy: Help! Me hungry! * Grunty: Don't worry friend, just say the word! I will help you better than Banjo's dumb bird! * Chimpy: Me want orange! BIG orange! * Grunty: An orange you say? Consider it done! I'll find you the biggest BIGGEST one! * Chimpy: Thank you! Chimpy wait right here. In Conga's Smuggled Orange Hideout - Part 1 * Grunty: What is this place? What's that smell? It's Vitamin C, as far as I can tell... * Conga: This Conga's secret orange stash. Conga like oranges to himself. * Grunty: I like to buy an orange please. One bigger than the world's biggest cheese. * Conga: Conga accept only Banana bucks. Conga no like music notes. * Grunty: Dollar bills instead of notes? At least it's better than smelly goats. * Conga: Biggest orange is seventy hundred banana bucks. * Grunty: Seventy hundred banana bucks?! I'd rather hit you with a dozen hockey pucks! * Conga: Hey, that not very nice! Witch lady hurt Conga's feelings! * Grunty: Alright, I'm sorry, I just got upset. I shall get the money, so don't you fret. * Conga: Conga accept witch lady's apology. Conga save orange for witch. In Conga's Smuggled Orange Hideout - Part 2 * Grunty: Here you go, seventy hundred bills. I bet you're so rich you have the chills. * Conga: Witch right! Conga flithy rich! Conga now give witch biggest orange. In the volcano * This lava is hot, hot HOT! Do I enjoy this? No, I do not! Trivia * One of Grunty's quotes is a reference to the DK Rap. Category:Banjo is Back!